Going through a separation or divorce and attempting to establish shared custody may be stressful and emotionally draining. Let’s see essential rules to keep in mind at the time of divorce.
Finding a skilled lawyer in Springfield, knowing the fundamental rules, budgeting, receiving emotional support and are the most important aspects of a divorce.
Developing a practical shared parenting plan keeping in mind everyone’s schedule is the best approach. Here are listed a few golden rules to help you sail through the phase.
Five rules to make joint custody work for you
Don’t speak badly about your spouse
Experts echo the same: don’t criticize your ex. “As the child is made of both the separating parents, talking ill about the ex will be absorbed by the child,” says David Pisarra, author of A Man’s Guide To Child Custody.
“What you say about the ex will affect the child’s reaction and how they perceive themselves.”
Regardless of how angry you are with your ex, your child might still love him or her as a parent.
Keep your sentiments about your ex to yourself, whether they are legitimate or not.
Shared custody is about the child and not about you
It was about you in the divorce, but it’s about the kids in custody.
Divorce causes narrowing of outlook, and people become so preoccupied with their own hurts and desires that the goal of raising a healthy kid becomes secondary. Custody isn’t about your wants or gains, it is more for the betterment of the child. The most challenging element for co-parenting is to remember that time with the kid is a gift to be treasured, not a reward to be gained.
Both the parents should put their egos aside and understand that what suits best for the child is not necessarily what can make you feel good as a person. Shared custody works best and it helps treat the child psychologically and overall.
Be real with your commitments
“Parents often make unreasonable custody demands after a divorce based on insecurity or fear,” says Laura Wasser, a celebrity divorce lawyer in LA. Instead, custody must be seen more wisely. Take your emotions out of the equation and focus on the facts.
Divorce is a critical phase and obtaining legal counsel from an experienced Springfield divorce lawyer will help you.
Build a custody plan that suits your child
You should examine the following factors while deciding on a custody agreement.
- The ages and personalities of your children
- Your family’s timetable
- Each parent’s professional and social obligations
- Your children’s involvement in academic and extracurricular activities
- The distance between the parents’ houses and your child-care options.
Based on the above factors, what you have to do next is create your customized plan.
A lousy spouse might not be a bad parent
Your ex might have been terrible towards you, but if they were wonderful parents, or have the capability of being a great parent, do not snatch from them the parental rights.
Even if your marriage didn’t work out, you might have great parenting to offer.
What is to be done? Prioritize your child and their needs.
Aside from the rules mentioned above, there are a few other considerations to keep in mind. Find an excellent approach to communicate, choose your conflicts wisely, and prioritize your child. Your child must feel that they are being heard and that their requirements are being addressed.