Studies show that not as many people marry these days as once did. That’s partially because many individuals are not as religious as they used to be, so they don’t see anything problematic about cohabitating with a partner without marrying them first. Some people still marry one another, though, and there’s no reason to think that this custom will ever completely go away. If you’re male, and you’re about to become a husband for the first time, you might feel a little bit nervous. Maybe you’ve asked relatives for advice, or you’ve talked to your friends who have taken the plunge. We’ve compiled a list of some ways that you can be a better husband. If you follow our advice, there is no reason why you and your spouse should not be happy together for many years to come.
Care for Your Spouse’s Family Members, Just Like They Do
When you marry someone, you’re tying yourself to them in a legally binding way. That also usually means you’re inviting their family into your life, to a greater or lesser extent.
Maybe your new spouse doesn’t get along with their family members, so you never have to see them. The opposite could be true, though. Your spouse might have a closely-knit family unit, and if that’s the case, expect to see your new in-laws pretty frequently.
Ideally, you will get along well with them. If your spouse loves their relatives very much, you owe it to them to at least try and get along with these individuals as well. If you can’t do that, that’s probably going to cause friction between the two of you.
You can do things like inviting them over for holidays or Sunday dinners if they live nearby. If your spouse has to put an older relative in a facility at some point, you can visit the nursing home to ensure there’s no abuse taking place. The more you can demonstrate that you care about these people too, the more your spouse should appreciate that.
You Can Cook for Them
Maybe both you and your spouse work. You might have professional lives that you care about a lot. You may both strive to get ahead and use income and promotions to mark your success.
There’s nothing wrong with that, but it can take a lot out of you. Maybe you feel like your spouse’s job stresses them out a lot.
If so, small gestures can help them realize that you’re in their corner and you’re doing all you can to help them succeed. For instance, you might surprise them with a nice, home-cooked meal when they get back from work a couple of times per week.
It’s fine to order a pizza or get some Chinese food to have it on the table and waiting for them when they get back from putting in a long day, but it means more if you cooked the meal yourself. You should ask what your spouse’s favorite foods are and learn how to make them.
You Can Tell Them You Love Them Each Day
For years, society expected men to be stoical and silent. They should not discuss their feelings or express them at all. These days, most men understand that avoiding their feelings or burying them is harmful behavior.
You ought to tell your spouse that you love them at least once every day. If you’re having a brief phone conversation with them, it does no harm to say “I love you” before you hang up. You might say it when you’re on your way out the door in the morning or before you go to bed at night.
It’s no good to think, “well, my spouse knows that I love them, so I don’t need to say it very often.” Sometimes, when someone is having a hard day, that simple statement from their partner can pick them up. You never know how much good you’re doing with these daily affection affirmations.
You Can Get Them Flowers Just Because
Flowers are a time-honored way to let your spouse know that you care about them and you’re thinking about them. You can be a good husband by getting your spouse flowers not just on their birthday or for your anniversary, but for no reason at all.
Like saying “I love you,” this shows them that you still care and think about them all the time. Many times, relationships falter because the two partners begin to take each other for granted. You can sidestep this issue by letting your spouse know with either flowers or small gifts that they remain first and foremost in your thoughts at all times.
You Can Do Chores Without Them Asking You
Maybe you find that your spouse is always asking you to do chores. Perhaps they want you to mow the lawn, take out the garbage, vacuum, or something else.
You can do those things from now on without them asking you. This demonstrates to them that you care about their needs. You do not want to be in a relationship where your spouse always has to pester you to do something, asking you several times before you get around to it.
You should do all you can to keep them happy, which means prioritizing the little things they want you to do. If you get into this habit, they will understand that you love and cherish them. They will also probably respond in kind.
You can be a better husband through many small acts as well as larger ones. Writing a little love note that your spouse can find before they go to work is always nice.
You don’t always need expensive or grandiose gestures. Tiny, simple things that say you care can be the foundation on which you base your happy marriage.
One last thing about being a good husband: listen when your spouse communicates something to you. Ignoring their wants and needs always harms a relationship.