Relationships fail due to many reasons, but the most common one is aiming for perfection. People who do this often highlight the negative and take the positive for granted because of high expectations.
They’ll then look for another partner in pursuit of the perfect one. The catch is that the perfect one doesn’t exist.
You can make what you have now the best relationship you’ll ever have. It takes your commitment, too, to become the perfect partner.
The truth is that most relationships are salvageable if both parties want to put effort into their relationship repair. However, the effort isn’t all it takes to save a dying relationship.
Keep on reading to learn how to repair a broken relationship.
1. Communicate Your Issues
The foundation of every healthy relationship is communication. There’s a high chance it’s what you’re lacking in your relationship, leading to all sorts of issues. That’s why relationship repair starts with communicating with your partner.
Communicate what you feel, what you think, what your issues are, and so on. The intent should be to make the other party understand and not to point fingers. The best way to express yourself is to do that without accusing your partner.
2. Listen with the Intent to Understand
You deserve to have your voice heard, but remember that your partner does, too. Remember that they’re trying to make you understand, as well.
Listen to what makes them feel or act a certain way. Listen to what issues they see in the relationship. Listen to every word they say, even if they may be hurtful.
Don’t wait for your turn to speak. Rather, understand the essence of what they’re speaking. Both sides should do this so a couple can come to an understanding.
3. Keep Your Emotions at Bay
Sometimes, the things the other partner says will hurt your ego or feelings. Sometimes, the hurt from their past actions return.
No matter what, though, you should keep your emotions at bay while communicating. Emotions that come bubbling during discussion might interfere with the process. This will bring you back to square one.
When extreme emotions kick in, the possibility that your words become misinterpreted or vice versa becomes higher.
4. Take Responsibility for Yourself
When learning how to repair a broken relationship, you’ll understand there are two sides to a coin. Your partner isn’t the only one in a relationship; you should see your faults, too.
If your partner has issues with your words or actions, don’t try to justify them. You can’t justify hurtful words and actions, and you can’t dictate what the other person feels.
Take responsibility for your actions/inactions and said/unsaid words. If you have to say something in defense, remember our tips above. Let the other party finish what they’re saying first, and express yourself in a way they’ll understand.
5. Let Go of the Past
Learning how to repair a relationship after cheating means letting go of the past and focusing on the future. Cheating is especially hard to recover from, no matter which side was at fault. This also applies to other issues.
Letting go is the start of healing. Once you remove the anger in your heart, you give space to forgiveness and love. It helps you reconnect because you won’t be holding on to resentment anymore.
6. Find Solutions Together
Once you have your issues laid down, it’s time to start working toward solutions. Communication is still the key here as you’ll have to make compromises, discuss each other’s perspective, and more.
If you have a deep understanding of each other, then finding solutions will be easier. You’ll know the motivations of the other person and you’ll realize what they’re trying to achieve.
It should be the same for the other person, too. You should be in the same place when taking the first step toward a new, healthier relationship.
7. Give Your Partner Space
A healthy relationship isn’t about being so crazy about each other that you need to be together 24/7. Keep in mind that before they’re a partner, they’re an individual first. They need space to take care of themselves.
Give your partner space and time when making decisions, when processing their feelings, or as requested. This allows them to think for themselves without outside input.
Even when in a relationship, you should also both keep your personal spaces thriving. This helps strengthen your relationship.
8. Put in the Effort
The talks are over, now it’s time for some actions. Remember the solution you’ve talked about?
Well, it’s not a solution until you turn it into reality. The effort you put into your new relationship seals the deal.
While you’re doing everything you can to solve the problem, remember to take this opportunity to make your partner feel loved, too, through your actions. This is especially important when you learn that your partner’s love language is acts of service.
9. Do Something New
While you’re at it, make the effort to explore new things together, as well. Find a new activity you can enjoy together or do something you’ve always wanted to do.
The new experiences will give you something to bond over. It will also give you time to enjoy each other’s company and laugh together. It will give you new memories that aren’t yet tainted by your past mistakes.
10. Find Support
The way to fix a broken relationship isn’t something you should take alone. Find support anywhere you can, but make sure it’s the right type of support.
Surround yourself with friends and family that understand your situation. Find those that can give you positive encouragement and not those that exacerbate the issue.
If you need an unbiased opinion, find a couples’ therapist. They can lead the way and help you see things more clearly when you’re clouded by emotions. They can also help you sort out knots and find underlying reasons for your actions, feelings, and such.
It’s a good idea to find one as you begin to attempt reconciliation and as you go through it.
Learn More About Relationship Repair
Relationship repair isn’t a process you can do in one sitting. All the steps above may take days, weeks, or even months to complete. The important thing is that you don’t give up while making sure you hear and understand each other’s side.
Our first tip matters in all steps; keep communicating and ensure your hearts are both in the same place. For more tips, check out more of our relationship and lifestyle guides today!