What Is BDSM? BDSM for beginners

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What Is BDSM? BDSM for beginners

BDSM? Still afraid or ashamed of this acronym? There is no need for that! Abusive sexual practices are often considered a perversion, and their supporters are people with mental disorders. But recently, science has questioned these theses. We found out whether BDSM followers are unhealthy and what benefits they get from this type of relationship. 

What does it mean? 

BD — bandage, and discipline; DS – dominant and submissive (dominance and submission);

SM — sadomasochism.

Thus, in general, sexual practices based on the exchange of power and associated with loss of mobility, infliction of pain, and humiliation fall under the definition of BDSM. It is not mandatory all at once, but one condition is always fulfilled: the listed actions are voluntary.

Hence the question that worries many people: who in their right mind would agree to humiliation and torture? Scientists have come to the conclusion that BDSM is simply a sexual interest or subculture, the majority of whose adherents were not victims of violence and did not experience problems in “ordinary” sex.

BDSM is not only a huge layer in intimate relationships but also a whole culture. And what some people see from the outside is just the tip of the iceberg, which is the product of wrong stereotypes and prejudices. That is why we consider it our sacred duty to tell you more about this subculture, present everything in the right light, and if you’re lucky, sow the seed of desire to try such sex games at least once. After all, it is impossible to form an objective opinion about what you do not know or what you have not tried. Moreover, who knows, maybe in this you will find yourself in sex?

The importance of trust and safety

First, you need to start with the desire and understanding that this experiment can be one of the brightest and most delightful in your sex life. Moreover, this is evidenced by millions of happy people around the world, among whom you may be. In fact, BDSM has nothing to do with violence in the specific sense of the word, and everything happens exclusively voluntarily. And there is no question of somehow traumatizing or maiming the lower partner! The partners initially agree on how far the games can go, what actions are categorically unacceptable, and even draw up a script.

Which role do you choose?

Nevertheless, choosing a role for yourself is important: dominant or victim. To make the choice easier, close your eyes and just try to imagine yourself in one or another role. If you get a thrill from dominating your partner, then it’s time to try yourself as someone who loves power. If, on the contrary, you are fascinated by strength, power, and somewhat brutality in relation to you, then the role of a victim is ideal for you and a bondage spreader bar from BeSex store would serve you well. Experiment!

Stop-what?

Be sure to come up with stop words or stop gestures. This is essential. They are designed so that the lower partner (in case the game has crossed the acceptable limits and instead of pleasure he/she gets pain) can inform the upper partner about this and stop the game. With words, everything is clear, the main thing is not to come up with difficult to pronouncing or make long phrases. Stop gestures can be shaking your head or triple slapping your palm on the floor or bed.

Viva accessories! 

Accessories are the main component of a class role-playing game. Leave the work to the costumes and accessories, let them do it better than our imagination. 

Of course, someone will want to save money and use a cut clothesline instead of professional shackles or a whip to replace a broom, but this will be extremely wrong. It is not necessary to purchase expensive clothes or devices at the very beginning. The main thing is that these are professional items, which means they are safe. And security, as mentioned above, is one of the main components in this matter. And so what we need. First of all, role-playing costumes are needed, and not necessarily made of leather and with frightening spikes. It can be garters, sword belts, or just a maid outfit. However, at the same time, they must be selected taking into account that it is immediately clear who is the master and who is his servant. Adherents of BDSM pay special attention to the collars or chokers, and putting them on (and especially the first one) is considered almost a sacred rite. In this way, the initiation of the lower into his role is completed, and from that moment the relationship between the servant and the master begins. Further, this accessory serves as a symbol of submission, and each time it is put on, it evokes appropriate associations with its “humiliating” position. Some people wear a discreet choker even on the street, while at the same time becoming more and more immersed in their role. Some models include leash attachments.

Also, we really advise you to pay attention to handcuffs with a soft lining or leather. This will prevent you from damaging the skin on your wrists and will not cause unnecessary pain. And how to fix your partner is already a matter of your imagination. It can also be a spreader bar with cuffs specifically for those who want to really disarm their partner to the fullest. You can opt for a single bondage spreader bar without cuffs if you want to give your partner more mobility.

Masks are charming in the BDSM process. They can close their partner`s eyes or even their entire face like a cover. Some of them are designed for dominants and look intimidating, while others are needed for the lower, limiting their senses. This leads to the fact that (not seeing his master) the enslaved person becomes more frightened, and the sensations from each touch intensify. Visual deprivation enhances sexual sensuality, allowing you to experience a more intense orgasm.

The main thing anywhere is not to be afraid to experiment and act. We will understand that we like something, be it BDSM or some other things, only if we try them. So, let’s experiment, don’t be afraid, listen to our partner and learn to explain and communicate our secret desires to our partner, and then we will find what brings us the most powerful satisfaction and what we need most.

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