Before anyone says the words “I DO, “which are the most waited in a wedding ceremony, there is so much that comes with it. A wedding is a beautiful ceremony that was celebrated even in the Bible, and Jesus turned water into wine in the marriage of Cana, and this symbolized that it is more of a celebration in the unity of two people and as the word says, “What God has put together, let no man put a sander. “Before this happens, there are things that each party and both parties must do, and this article looks deeply at how to prepare for your Christian wedding.
1 ) Choose the most critical aspect of your day – The wedding day is a big day for both parties as it is only done once. The couple must then choose what they value most about a wedding and focus on it to ensure that the day is memorable. For instance, for me as a lady, the gown is something I value most, and so I will put in all effort to see that I have the best dress on this day. A shift that I have always envisioned will remain memorable to me. For the bride, he should look at something he values so much about a wedding day and put as much effort and work as required.
2) Meet your parents for marriage blessings – as a tradition, there are family meetings to introduce the families together. It is then followed by a series of gatherings involving dowry payment. It is traditional, but in the Christian setup, it is a way of asking for blessings from our parents. It is an honor to both families, and it creates a harmony that there are the pre-marriage celebrations. In these ceremonies, we exchange cultures, and it is also a way of learning some of the cultures to expect from your spouse.
3)Make a proposed budget – A wedding can be consuming monetary wise, and both parties must agree on the budget and know how to finance the wedding. There are always the options of fully funding your wedding or having friends come in through support groups and even pre-wedding to help raise the required budget. Always learn to stick to the budget and do away with extras as long as they can fit into the budget. Unfortunately, some people will have debts after the wedding, which affects them. It is therefore wise enough to work with the available resources.
4)Set the wedding date – this is not a highly complex process to set out the wedding date. After setting the wedding date, you can liaise with significant parties to the wedding to see if it’s appropriate to avoid making it public and then having to change the dates. This includes asking the official officiant of the wedding, such as the priest or pastor, about their availability to ensure that it is comfortable to the major players of the wedding.
5)Liturgical preparation -Go over the wedding ceremony with the wedding officiant. Choose your readings and prayers carefully while paying attention to the liturgy and discuss any essential tasks you wish for of any topics you want to be addressed on this day. The arrangements play a significant role in becoming aware of the mystery of unity and fruitful love, which is the main focus of the wedding celebration.
6 ) Catholic marriage preparation class– The groom and the future spouse should attend some of the set things to do as a couple and what doctrines to follow. Some of the courses are administered by the catechists and the priests, who explain what spouses as Christians should do. During this time, you present your best couple to the priest, and as a catholic tradition, the best couple should be an example to the couple and thus should most probably have a catholic background, but it is not a must.
7)Organize and confirm honeymoon plans –check on flights, hotel reservations, and anything that pertains to the honeymoon. Look at clothing, accessories, and anything else you want to bring during your honeymoon. As well pack early enough for your honeymoon. On the last days of your wedding, you have so much to do that you can easily forget to pack for your honeymoon. It is then advisable to the packing earlier.
8) Spiritual preparation for the wedding: A marriage is not a bed of roses and it needs spiritual readiness and intervention. Walking into marriage before being spiritually prepared leaves one in the middle of turmoil when hard times come. Self introspect and investing in each partner’s growth are very important. In marriage, you learn to accommodate the other person’s character and attitude, which may not necessarily be what you believe in. You have to reflect, grow, and realize the best version of yourself as a person. Prayer often brings calmness and peace, and it is wise we pray for our marriages even before walking into them. It is good that you also join ministries in your community to connect with other couples that may guide you in your spiritual preparation. For instance, if you are in Surrey, Canada, join the community during Surrey prayer times and fellowship. Times will come when giving up is the only option we will have, but we will come out strong because of prayer. In marriage, learning to serve instead of being self-absorbed is key. In Matthew 20:25- 28, doing in marriage is explained in this scripture.
9) Identify a mentor couple – often, some issues arise, and we have no one total to about the experience. Having been married at a very young age, I came along with so many challenges that I did not know who to share with. I fell into some depression as the hard times were more than the happy days. I then learned the importance of sharing, and that is why I am an advocate of the identification of a couple of you who can share some of the issues.
10) Learn the value of commitment –God did not give divorce as an opt-out when he created marriage, and on the wedding day, people tale vows that only death will put them apart. Divorce in recent years has become very common due to many factors such as infidelity, gender-based violence, and even monetary reasons. Therefore, it is essential that the couple learns the value of commitment and even how to be committed in their marriages.
11) Learn how to resolve conflicts – very many marriages are often faced with how to solve conflict once they come up. Some opt-out, some keep silent, some become violent, and many other things. Therefore, it is wise before getting married to agree on some of the ways to resolve conflict between the two of you. It is essential to know to what extent can the disagreement get, to what time the arguments can go, and if it gets to very heated situations, then what can both of you do.
12 ) Learn to grow together –growth is inevitable and having a growth pattern that can be pointed out on both parties is equally important. When one person is growing, and the other is stagnant, it creates so much conflict as it results in many things, including adultery. Avery is a typical example for women after marriage. They give their all to their spouses and children, if any, and often neglect their wants. This is a situation where women leave their jobs school and leave their ambitions to try to support the spouse’s aspirations.
On the other hand, the man feels like the woman is too comfortable and needs to be challenged. This results in infidelity, and it is simply because a woman has the nature of mothering everything that comes their way. It is a sad and challenging truth, but before marriage, I would advocate that a woman is stable career-wise or has her financial dependence to avoid always being the one to beg for attention and affection.
13 ) Frequent the sacraments –matrimony in itself is a sacrament according to the catholic faith. There are other sacraments like a confession that the spouses should ensure they go before their wedding day. Holy communion is another sacrament and should be celebrated during the holy mass of your wedding by both parties if they have undergone catechism and have been given confirmation to receive the Holy Eucharist. Prayer forms the spiritual foundation of your marriage, and thus you should make it a habit of praying together so that the culture can even be passed on to your children. Do rosaries and novenas together and attend the Eucharistic Adorations for those of the catholic faith.